"Does she like me?"
This is probably the first thing on a guy's mind who just met a girl he is really into. There is no denying it - at times it is very hard to make sure if a girl really likes you or not, because sometimes girls are hard to read. But generally, attraction is pretty straightforward - she either likes you or doesn't.
Girls probably hate rejection more than you do, this is why they try to be very subtle about showing interest and hardly ever tell you straight out that they like you. Nevertheless, when a girl likes you, she will always try to make it as clear as possible to you. Therefore, it's up to you to pick up on her signals.
When She Likes You
So, here are some tells that she is into you:
+ She laughs at your jokes when no one else does. If you tell a lame joke and she is the only one laughing, you can be sure that she likes you.
+ Uses every opportunity to see you. She uses every opportunity to be around you, sometimes even "accidentally" bumping into you.
+ Tries to make herself noticeable to you. She might raise her voice in your vicinity or even wear clothes that make you notice her. She will try every trick possible, to get your attention.
+ You have her full attention. She will stay focused on you, even when people around you are talking to her. She will look at you like you're the only one in her vicinity.
+ She "tells" you with her body language. This is by far the best indicator. When a girl likes you, she will touch you often. She will sit or stand very close to you, often even occupying your personal space. She will keep long eye contact with you. When you are talking to her, she will always face you and even plays with her hair when looking at you.
Of course, there are more signs than this. But if you pay close attention to these ones, you will know whether she's into you or not. And like I said before, she will actively help you by trying to make it as obvious as possible anyway. As long as you pay attention to her, you will get a pretty good idea where you stand with her.
When She Doesn't Like You
Now, let's take a look at the signs that reveal she isn't into you. Also, let's not deal with the very obvious ones, like ignoring you or actively trying to avoid you.
When you approach a girl, it's often hard to immediately recognize whether she is interested. Other times, she even gives you her number, Facebook and goes on a date with you, but then suddenly loses interest. That's why here are some examples where she isn't interested in you (anymore):
- Doesn't put any effort into meeting you again. This is the biggest tell ever, if she doesn't put effort into seeing you again, you're out.
- Talks sparingly. When you are talking to her face to face, online or over text and she gives very short answers or basically just reacts to you, she has lost interest. Girls who used a lot of emojis before, start to use them sparingly or stop completely.
- Makes excuses instead of finding a solution. Just like with the first one, she's doesn't put any effort into meeting you and has a convenient excuse ready instead of offering you an alternative.
- Doesn't flirt. When you try to flirt with her, she doesn't respond to you with the same or changes the topic completely.
- Isn't active in the conversation. You are basically the one who tries to keep the conversation alive with her.
- Isn't interested in you. When she never asks any personal questions or talks that much about herself. She might tell you personal stuff, but only when you ask.
Now, just one remark before moving on. Often it's up to you to be the decisive one and not get discouraged by her behavior. For example, if you are setting up a date with her and she has an excuse why she can't go on a particular day, you have to offer an alternative and be very persistent about it. A girl offering you an alternative is a great sign of attraction, not something you should expect. But if her excuses continue, you should move on. Also, when you strike up a conversation with a girl, you obviously have to be the one who carries it.
What to Do if She Doesn't Like You?
So what do you do in a case where she isn't interested (anymore)? Well, sorry to tell you this, but there is really nothing you can do about it. You can't change her mind, no matter how much you try. You can't logically convince her how great you are, you can only show it to her. And if you blew your chance, you might not get another.
The only way you can ever have a shot with her again is to let her go and grow as a man - to improve yourself. If you have become a more confident and secure person and then happen to see her again, after a lot of time has passed, MAYBE she will look at you differently. But don't keep counting on it.
Therefore, your best chance is not to blow it in the first place. But if it still happens, just accept it and move on. No point in beating yourself up about it. It doesn't matter how special you think she might be, you will always find someone else, someone better.
Always Assume Attraction
If you aren't sure whether a girl likes you or not, then always assume that she is attracted to you. The reason for this is quite simple - this way you will force yourself to act. This means that you try to make your move and at least give yourself a chance with her (no matter how slim it might be). Otherwise, you lose by default because you didn't do anything.
So every time you meet a woman you like, assume that she is already attracted to you as well. Even if she isn't, at least you try. At least you have the balls to act. You know what happens to guys who wait too long? They end up in the friend zone! And you probably already know that this is not where you want to end up.