Coming up with great topics you can talk about can be a challenge sometimes. But there is one thing you probably haven’t considered: if you obsess over all the different topics you could talk about with a girl, instead of thinking about how to actually talk to her, you are focusing on the wrong thing!
Yes, that’s true! The secret to talking to girls isn’t about some special, magical topics that help them to open up to you and tell you everything you want to hear, it’s actually all about how you talk to them.
And this is actually good news for you if you are struggling to find topics to talk about with a girl you like. This means that almost any topic goes, as long as you have enough conviction and attitude behind it. Make it fun and entertaining and you can literally speak about any subject you want.
So, instead of giving you a bunch of topics you could talk to her about, let’s look at the things that give you the “superpower” of a great conversationalist. But hey, if you still need some topics and specific things to make your discussions flow, you should take a look at Conversation Escalation. It will turn you into an excellent social animal and make your interactions with women smooth and effortless.
The Most Important Thing to Focus On
Like I already mentioned, you shouldn’t focus on any specific topic. The topic isn’t that important. Make your interactions with her fun and interesting, and she will be ready to talk to you about anything you want.
You see, women love when a guy is in a sense “free.” When he doesn’t restrict himself in any way and doesn’t make a big deal about how he might come across to others. The reason why you’re struggling to come up with a topic and talking to her, isn’t because you need a good conversation topic, it’s because you aren’t that free. You are holding yourself back because you fear how she might perceive you when you choose a terrible topic.
To rid yourself of this problem, all you have to do is to realize that you have nothing to lose. Now, you might be thinking that you will lose her if you talk about the “wrong” topic, but if you are too restricted and can’t even come up with anything, you will lose her anyway. So why not just talk about the things you want? Stop putting this pressure on yourself! Say the first thing that comes to your mind and you will see that she will follow your lead.
The trick here is not to stress about it and feel comfortable in your own body while talking to her. If you don’t, then even the best conversation topics in the world will not save you. Keep in mind that the things you say don’t really have to be perfect, as long as you feel totally comfortable, she can sense that and will focus more on it than to the words you use. That’s also why people always say that nonverbal communication plays a bigger role in conversations than the words you actually use.
And you know what actually happens when you let go and feel totally at ease while talking to a girl? You actually become a better conversationalist. Yes, because you don’t care anymore about what to say and are free to express yourself in any way you want, you allow yourself to be creative. Because there is nothing that stifles your creativity more than restrictions.
If you let go of these meaningless restraints, you will also come up with brilliant topics. This is also why so many men rely on alcohol to talk to women – it makes them free to say whatever they want, without holding themselves back. And unless they are too drunk, they usually come up with funny and witty topics.
Topics to Avoid
Like we already discussed, you can talk about anything you want. But it’s a good idea to demonstrate a bit of social awareness and maybe avoid some topics (but you could still pull them off if you were confident enough).
Basically, what you would want to avoid is anything that could be taken negatively, or where she could emotionally disagree with you. Topics like religion and politics, are probably the most notorious of these things and therefore, best to be avoided. They are also probably the lamest ones anyway. So, if you want to avoid boring her and actually to remember the conversation she had with you as fun and interesting, avoid them.
You should also avoid talking about yourself or your material possessions. Unless she explicitly asks about such things, there is no reason to bring them up in a conversation. Talking about your expensive car or the nice watch you are wearing isn’t going to impress her unless she specifically focuses on them and mentions it. And even then, it’s best to stay humble and avoid bragging.
If you absolutely have to talk about yourself, don’t talk about boring stuff like what you do (unless you are a pilot or astronaut) or something that could be perceived as such. Instead, talk about things that excite you and motivate you, something you find interesting. But hey, if you love your work and think it’s interesting and meaningful, go ahead. As long as you are passionate about the subjects you talk about, she will be listening to them intensely.
Just keep the boring or mundane topics to a minimum and you will do great!
What to Talk About
So if you really want to know what topics to talk about with a girl you like, then focus on everything that is fun and interesting. Everything that sparks emotion in her is great! The secret of a good conversationalist is that he can immerse the listeners into his stories. This means that if you can make the topics you talk about fun, interesting and immersive, you can talk about anything you want.
Again, if you think you need more help with this, then I strongly recommend you to take a look at Conversation Escalation. It is by far one of the best conversation courses out there with a lot of practical examples and valuable advice. It will really make a difference how you talk to the girl you like.