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If you see yourself as a pussy, it means that you have gotten used to losing and most likely even identify with it.

It also means that you have given up on trying to change your circumstances just because the times you have actually tried, you have failed miserably.

But this doesn’t mean you have to accept it and stay this way!

You can, in fact, turn your life around and change it completely when you learn how to stop being a pussy.

And in this article, we are going to look at how you can do exactly that!

The Victim Mentality and Taking Responsibility

Now, if you want your current situation to improve, there is one simple but painful truth you have to accept about yourself before you can change anything:

You’re a pussy because of your own actions and inactions!

This means that no matter how much you would like to blame it on outside factors (people or events in your life you have no control over), you are not a victim of your circumstances.

Yes I know, this statement probably feels like a gut punch after you’re already down. But if you are serious about changing yourself, you need to take responsibility and acknowledge that you are to blame for the failures in your life!

And let’s be honest (and make it even more painful), you’re not helpless either!

While it’s very likely that life has thrown you a curveball, you only feel helpless because you have given up and let all the bad things that have happened to you define you and influence your life decisions.

But the good news is that if you let go of this victim mentality and accept responsibility for all of your decisions, your “healing process” can begin!

Look, I get it, learning that you are responsible for the failures in your life is a pretty hard pill to swallow.

You might even resist this idea simply because you have seen overwhelming evidence that supports your current views (you are the victim and can’t do anything about it).

But that’s only because you have accepted the role of a victim and have even conditioned yourself to see evidence that supports such views. Everything that contradicts them you either dismiss or find convenient excuses why they can’t possibly apply to you.

People often say that your reality is what you make of it. So if you have decided to give up and play the victim, you really have become one – it has become your reality.

You have given up and accepted your place in the world and “know” that there is nothing you can do to change it.

You have started to justify your victim status, instead of creating your place in the world.

However, you haven’t become a victim of your circumstances but of your own thoughts and convictions. And if you decide to continue down this path, this will always stay your reality!

So, your only option is to do something about your situation!

You have to let go of your victim complex and take charge of your life again! And the only way you can do that is to take decisive action.

If you want to become a better man, then now it’s the time to step up and go after the things you want! Don’t make excuses or think of reasons why something is out of your reach.

If you want to stop being a loser, you have to take action and tirelessly go after whatever you want, even if it’s the hardest thing you will ever do!

Now, before we move to the part that will (hopefully) de-pussify you, let’s look at another obstacle that you will have to face before you can change…

Face Your Fears

Since you have endured many failures, your subconscious has created a highly effective response mechanism to “protect” you from further harm whenever you try to step out of your comfort zone.

It’s called fear.

No matter how motivated you are to take action, fear will often still stop you dead in your tracks and push you even further into hiding by reminding you of all the failures you have faced.

That’s the reason:

  • why you refuse to approach that cute girl you like,
  • why taking risks isn’t your thing,
  • why you would rather stay at home and watch TV than go out and socialize with people.

Fear is what keeps hitting the brakes every time you try to gather momentum because it tries to protect you from failing.

But the one thing you should learn about failure is that it is unavoidable! That’s why it makes absolutely no sense to be afraid of it, beat yourself up about it, or even identify with it.

What you should do instead, is to learn from your failures and see them as what they actually are – opportunities to learn.

Everybody fails, all the time!

The only thing that differentiates successful people from the rest is their attitude towards failure – they never identify with their failures but use them as an opportunity to learn and grow.

Sure, they are still sometimes afraid of failing, but they know that the rewards always outweigh the risks and that’s why they act despite it.

There isn’t much I could say to you to get over your fears.

While telling you to “get your shit together and man up” might offer some incentive, a much better option would be if you imagined the following:

What would you regret more on your deathbed, all the opportunities you took but failed, or the ones you didn’t?

Now, if you don’t have the answer, then let me tell you the biggest regrets of dying people:

  1. not taking enough risks and
  2. not going after what they wanted.

So, if you don’t want to leave this planet with regrets about all the things you missed because you were too busy being a pussy, then do the things you want to do and stop worrying about the consequences!

In today’s society, there isn’t much you should be afraid of anyway. Most of your fears are irrational and in most cases will not come true.

And even if they did, they still wouldn’t end your life!

One thing is for certain: you will have to encounter many things you’re afraid of in the course of your lifetime, if you let them dictate your life, you’re going to miss out on all the great things it has to offer!

Accept that fear will always be a part of your life and you can’t run or hide from it. The only way to overcome it is to experience it.

While that’s not going to be pleasant, it won’t pose any real threat and will actually help you to grow as a person. So, if you want to stop being afraid all the time, face your fears!

Ultimately you should learn that the fears you have are unnecessarily holding you back from achieving greatness. That’s why you have to challenge them and do things that you are afraid of doing!

How to Stop Being a Pussy

While the struggle to become better might seem bleak at the moment, don’t get discouraged by it.

Start small and don’t take on more than you can chew, or you might run the risk of giving up again.

The more small successes you have, the more confident you will become, the more your situation will improve. The end result will be a guy who has the willpower and motivation to tackle the impossible!

But let’s take a look at some things you can do right now to become better:

1) Start adopting a more positive outlook on life. Even if it’s hard, it’s still better to see the negative in your life as a challenge than as another shit thing happening to you.

Instead of accepting why you can’t do something, find ways you can do it, and then go for it!

2) Move out of your comfort zone. Your first instinct will always be to take things easy, to always choose the easy way out.

But you have to start taking the way with resistance!

Go out of your way to challenge your fears and do things that scare you. Every challenge will make you stronger!

3) Realize that your problems aren’t as unique as you think. Most people struggle with the same fears and insecurities as you do.

The only difference is that they are just better at hiding and dealing with them. So, step up and do the same!

Your fears and problems aren’t unique, so don’t pretend that you’re the only one who suffers. Find people who have faced the same obstacles as you and figure out how they overcame them.

4) Write down everything that currently sucks in your life.

Hate your job and want to find a new one? Write it down!

Have no success with women? Then write it down!

You’re terrified of taking risks and really putting yourself out there? Write… it… down!

Write it all down and then start finding ways to fix them!

Once you have a nice list of all the problems and solutions, start fixing them! Choose a couple of sticking points and dedicate all of your time and energy on fixing them!

By taking care of one aspect of your life, you will see that it influences other areas as well and things start to get easier.

5) Acknowledge that you have no excuse to whine about your situation!

There are enough resources around to solve most of your problems. All you have to do is search for them!

Hell, if you have no idea where to start or what to do, send me an email and I’ll help you! Even better, get my program and fix most of your “being a pussy” problems!

But you have absolutely no excuse to whine and play the victim!

6) Stop looking for reasons and excuses why you fail and find the discipline and determination to see things through.

Instead of giving in and declaring the obstacles in your path as impossible, push through them.

If it helps, get mad at your current situation and use this anger to do something about it!

7) Acknowledge that no one is trying to keep you down from achieving greatness and there is always something you can do about your current situation.

8) Maybe the most important fact you should realize is that you’re on your own.

This means that no one is going to come to your rescue! If you don’t help yourself, nothing is going to change!

Sure, people might offer you a helping hand along the way, but no one is going to pick up the slack for you!

Recognize that you have to give it your all, or you’ll always stay who you are right now!

From Pussy to Badass

Now you should know everything there is to know to become a better version of yourself and it’s up to you to make it happen!

I can’t promise you success because, by now, you should already know that it depends on you. But one thing is for certain: if you never try, you will never know, and lose by default.

That’s why you have to trust in yourself and at least try to better yourself.

Even if you fail, you will still learn something from your failure so you can try again (this time smarter!). The worst things you can do is to lose hope in yourself or give up too soon.

Again, I should mention that if you need a good starting point, then my new course Rules of the Alpha Male will help you to overcome your victim complex and start taking charge of your life.

It will help you to get your shit together and change your life… and as an added benefit, you’ll become better with women!

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16 Comments

  1. Anonymous

    Sep 11, 2019 at 9:49pm

    Over a year ago me and my mate fell out and ever since she has been horrible to me. Forced everyone to hate me and made me feel worthless. And now It’s just gotten to the point where I want to beat her up, I am stronger than her but the problem is she has mates that are a lot bigger than me.

  2. Roman

    Jun 8, 2019 at 8:02am

    There is a problem I am dealing with, and it's with this kid who wants me to buy him an expensive jacket because I stained his other one. I am certain it washed off because he doesn't want to show it to me anymore. I would usually keep my dignity and fight about it if I need to (I do kickboxing), but the thing is, he knows people who can rob me, jump me, hurt me, etc. I know this because I have seen them before. He already threatened to do it if I do not buy him a jacket by this Friday, and I am at a crossroad. On one hand, do I buy him the jacket and keep going with life (I'm financially stable enough to buy it, but it'll be a small blow to my wallet), but lose my respect around others and be known as a pussy, telling myself that I will prove myself next time; Or do I fight, risking my own life for a stupid jacket? I can take my chances, keep my dignity, and fight, but have a chance to get robbed for possibly more than I would have bought the jacket for, or worse, end up in the hospital with broken bones and start a chain reaction of me moving to the middle of nowhere because my mom is overprotective, blah blah blah. I know you told me to not blame me being a pussy on others, and blame my own convictions. But I just can't help but blame it on an outside source this time (in this case, him being a coward and green lighting me). You said that risks won't put your life in danger, but this time I feel like it might. By the way, I'm 16, 90 average, wanting to go to the best university. I do not want my future ruined by some stupid shit like this.

    1. John

      AUTHOR Jun 8, 2019 at 2:20pm

      There are always going to be exceptions - you can't blame yourself for getting cancer either. You're really are in a shitty situation, and I can't possibly tell you what to do. Just something to consider: him blackmailing you might not end with the jacket. Once he smells weakness, he could start making other demands. Then again, you're completely right, it's a stupid jacket and if you can avoid escalating things further, it's a good idea to do it. Here are two scenarios you COULD consider, no matter what you decide to do: 1) If he knows that you do kickboxing, you can always tell him that you know people as well. You refuse his demand by asking for proof (so you seem reasonable) and if he still refuses, you tell him to fuck off because you know he's lying. Then you threaten him with retribution if he decides to do something to you. 2) You actually give in, but not because you're afraid of him, but because you "believe" him (about the jacket being ruined). However, you threaten him with retribution if he thinks about trying something else. This way you won't come across as weak. He might think you're stupid, but not weak. Again, I'm not telling you what to do. Not even sure if my advice is that good (not my area of expertise) but if you ever come back here, let me know how you decided.

  3. Joseph

    May 12, 2019 at 5:49am

    I feel like my biggest struggle in life is talking to a woman I think is attractive. And most of the time when it comes to women for me is that they're either taken(ring or not), live in another state, aren't interested, a lesbian, or something else. I met this one girl at work and after getting her social media I tried talking to her but she never once asked about me, not even how I'm doing. I continued to pursue her but she never once talked to me in detail, just short answers. I'm tired of just looking at a woman and finding her attractive. I'm tired of thinking about a girl I like and never knowing what could've been, whether it's a one night stand, regular thing, or actually becoming a relationship. At my age I feel like I'm not even boyfriend material and it's kind of embarrassing. Today I see a girl I think is hot and I assume she's either a mom or taken because let's face it: no hot girl is without one or the other in today's society. Sometimes I feel like I'll never find a girl that I truly want...

    1. John

      AUTHOR May 14, 2019 at 4:25pm

      If every girl you meet is either taken, lives somewhere else, is a coworker, or whatever, then you probably aren't meeting enough women. Also, it's never too late to turn yourself into boyfriend material.

  4. Simon

    Feb 26, 2019 at 5:56pm

    Hello, I'm 14 and have noticed how incredibly awkward I am. Whenever I am confronted I get the easy way out (Comply). If someone who I think is harder than me, I comply. I cant stop it. I have a very bad way with words too. I miss all opportunities and I try to find validation in my life. Here's a situation; Some dude who is harder than me throws pens at the back of my head. I ignore it, even though it hurts. I comply. I can never stand up for myself. If I do I get laughed at. Everyone thinks I'm weird because I have a weird seance of humour. When people spread rumours about me what can I do ? Someone asks me something e.g. a girl and I freeze and it takes forever for me to answer. I overthink it because I don't want to say the wrong thing and it makes me look weird and awkward. I do get minor bullying but I just can never ever stand up for myself. I suck at arguments and I just nod my head when someone says shit about me. I know if I respond I'll probably say something weird and people will laugh. If someone calls me out and says they will bang me, what am I meant to do ? How am I meant to respond ? What makes you is the way you respond and I suck at that part. When people twist my name into something like semen, what am I meant to do ? If I respond they will do it more. Another scenario, It's gymnastics and there's a trestle that I know I will fail if I try and jump over it and I pussy out at the last second. Im scared of any potential harm. I can never do a summer salt on a trampoline because I'm too big of a pussy. I wont confront a guy that is physically stronger than me because I'm a pussy. I'm a pussy in every sense of the the word and I need some help. ¬Simon

    1. John

      AUTHOR Feb 27, 2019 at 7:43pm

      You need to raise your testosterone levels. Join a gym or/and start taking full contact martial arts classes. By joining a gym, you'll bulk up and other guys will leave you alone once you look bigger than them. Additionally, you'll be more confident and feel like you're achieving something when you see the results. By doing martial arts, and learning how to take a punch, you'll eliminate most of your problems. You'll start to feel differently... carry yourself differently... and trust me... others will notice it too! Most bullies mess with you because they know you're weak. But if you look like someone who won't be intimidated, they'll stop (and if they don't, you can teach them a lesson). Oh, and if you still suck with women after all of this, come back in four years and buy my book.

  5. Anonymous

    Feb 25, 2019 at 8:11am

    i want to know how to get out of the closet to my parents. i need some balls

    1. John

      AUTHOR Feb 25, 2019 at 7:42pm

      Take a lesson from Nike and just do it. You will eventually have to tell them anyway. So, why wait? Maybe they already know and are just waiting for you to tell them. No matter the case, the sooner you do it the better.

  6. John Doe

    Feb 19, 2019 at 10:37pm

    Reproduction is a way for our DNA and cells to be immortal while it's host dies. Cells are smarter then us. The answer to life is immortality, cells figured out how to replicate to stay immortal, can u replicate? Nope well ur gunna die.

  7. Karma

    Feb 19, 2019 at 10:32pm

    This article is filled with people who actually think, speak and comprehend on the same level as I do. This is so surreal like, f*ck other people like me are out there.

  8. Anonymous

    Jan 25, 2019 at 11:27pm

    Damn thnx you, i am a girl and always crying whenever i just feel sad/bad. And that make everyone think i am a pussy. And i got no friend of that. .-.

  10. Eric

    Apr 14, 2018 at 10:55pm

    We can't all be Alpha males can we? Some of us are good husbands and fathers while secretly wishing we could have been born an Alpha male. Some of us were born to be Marines and some of us were born to be dishwashers. It's life! I am a pussy who has been married for 25+ years and have 4 kids. I am here because I am drunk and I am questioning my reason for being on this earth. I think I'm a good husband and father. I guess I'm a pussy but I'll still show up for work Monday!

    1. John

      AUTHOR Apr 17, 2018 at 12:19pm

      You don’t have to be born alpha, you can also become one. That’s the basic premise of this article (hell, the whole site). In fact, you’re not born anything! Basically, we all start as equals. While there’s a lot of factors that shape what you’ll end up doing with your life, you play the biggest role in it. Therefore, even a dishwasher can become a marine! Also, what makes you think you’re either an alpha or a good husband/parent? They’re not mutually exclusive! Alphas usually end up being the best fathers and husbands. Don’t really know you as a person but I would never call someone who’s been successfully married for 25+ years and raised 4 kids a pussy! It means he did something right in his life! However, when you’re questioning your existence, that’s something you should work on.

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