If you really like a woman, then you are also most likely trying to get to know her better. This means that at some point in your interaction with her you will try to create a connection. And the best way to do this is through connecting with her emotionally. But like most guys, you are probably clueless how to do it. That’s why this article is going teach you how.
It probably comes as a surprise to no one that to connect emotionally with another person, you have to talk to them. Most likely you will need to have long and profound discussions with them, where you gradually get to know each other before an emotional connection can develop. This means that you need to have some basic communication skills because knowing how to connect emotionally is usually the second step in the process.
To connect with a woman you like, you first have to know how to keep her engaged in what you are saying. Without this, you are trying to take on an impossible task. So, in case you don’t know how to keep women engaged, you should take a look at Conversation Escalation.
But let’s get to the point now: to emotionally connect with a woman you like, you have to talk about emotional, authentic topics. And while you might think that this is exactly what will get you rejected, you are most likely talking about all the wrong things.
How Not to Connect with a Woman
When we are talking about emotional topics, there are some things that should be avoided. Since many men assume that showing emotions means spilling your guts to a woman, they go off on a tirade how much she means to them, how important and beautiful they think she is and what a wonderful person she must be. But this is the last thing she should hear from them.
Although you would think that these things are exactly what a woman would want to hear, she never expects to hear them from someone she isn’t even dating. Yes, while you are already in a committed relationship with her, she will want to know how much she means to you. But if you bring this topic up before you even know her, you will come across as desperate and needy, and she will react to it by running for the hills.
Another thing you should avoid when trying to create an emotional connection with a girl you like is to go all emo on her – how unfair life is to you are how you are always so misunderstood. Your goal shouldn’t be to expose your weaknesses to her, women still prefer men with a strong emotional base. Just like with the previous example, only when you are already in a relationship with her, can you reveal some of your vulnerabilities to her. And even then, not all at once.
So, if you can’t talk about your feelings with her (for her), or show her your vulnerabilities, then what can you talk about? What do you talk about, if you truly want to create an emotional connection with a girl?
How to Create a True Emotional Connection
The way to create an authentic, emotional connection with another person isn’t actually that difficult. You don’t have to get overly emotional nor spill your guts to her. You just have to talk about the things that you are really excited and passionate about… and that’s basically it. You can even talk about your visions and goals – something you haven’t even achieved yet. As long as you genuinely care about these things, you will get her engaged. Yes, it’s actually that easy!
Also, you don’t really need to worry about the topic that much. If you are passionate about something and can articulate yourself in a captivating manner you will draw her in. But if you worry that the topic you are passionate about might be too boring for her, then the good news is that you don’t even have to talk about specifics – things you would have to explain. All you have to do is to talk about the emotions behind your passion:
For example, if you are passionate about something like programming, you don’t have to drone on and on about things she might not even understand. You just have to mention the reasons why you into it. By telling her why this is your passion, she will focus on that, instead of the actual details. Maybe you like it because it’s very logical and there is always a solution to a problem, then let her know how good it feels to finally find it. Maybe you like to tackle the impossible tasks, then describe her how exciting it is for you to finally conquer a new challenge. Whatever it is, just talk about it.
If you focus on the emotions behind your passion and goals, you will make her want to listen to you. And you know why? Because this will help her to open up to you. Just because you were so honest and told her about things you are passionate about, she will want to do the same. It’s human nature – we want to give back.
And this is exactly how you create an emotional connection with her – you share a bit of your world and she will respond by doing the same. Women are very empathic and if they notice how excited you get when talking about your passions, how you show your emotions, they will immerse themselves into your topic.
Learning to Create Connections
While this was a very simplified example of connecting with women emotionally, it’s how these things usually happen. You connect with someone by authentically sharing a part of yourself, and they reciprocate. This creates the feeling of unity and brings out commonalities that help to form a strong bond.
But like I already mentioned, all this is not possible if you suck at something basic like talking to women. If you can’t even keep a conversation going, then you should really focus on learning to improve this skill first. It will be a vital part of creating a connection with the girl you like. So, here is Conversation Escalation again. It is by far the best course to improve your communication skills.
Keep her engaged, and an emotional connection will in most cases happen by itself.