Women test men all the time. Whether you already knew this or just became aware of it now, the fact remains the same – every man has at some point in his life been tested by a woman.
For most guys though, this isn’t the problem. The actual problem arises when they don’t even realize that they are being tested and start making stupid mistakes. Hell, there could be a woman standing behind you right now… testing you… and you wouldn’t even know it!
But all jokes aside, to know when you are being tested you first have to understand what exactly a test is. Then you have to recognize one. And finally, you need to be able to react (or not react) to it in the right way.
So, let’s take a look at how to accomplish all of that...
What is a Test and Why Do You Need to Pass it?
For women, a test is a fast and effective screening tool that allows them to determine what kind of man they’re dealing with – whether or not he has the characteristics that make him attractive. It lets women get a glimpse of the “real you” without spending too much time on getting to know you. Just like you will immediately “disqualify” girls you’re not attracted to merely by looking at them, they will do the same by using testing.
If you manage to pass her tests on a consistent basis, she will categorize you as an alpha male and feel attraction for you. If not, then she’s going to see you as a wimp and lose interest... if there was any to begin with.
Keep in mind that it’s not always this black and white! Not every girl will see you as an alpha just because you passed her test, nor will she consider you a wimp if you didn't. There are more factors in attraction than just this one. So, if you need a more in-depth explanation of what to do to attract girls, then you’ll find the solution at the end of the article.
But what happens if you fail a test?
If you fail, she will quickly lose interest in you. And even though she might keep interacting with you because she is trying to be nice, she has already made up her mind – you’re not the man for her! In this case, getting her interest back is going to be a real challenge (often impossible) and usually, the best course of action is to move on.
That’s why passing her tests becomes so important: it will make sure that she becomes and stays attracted to you. Therefore, be ready to get tested all the time!
Now, here is an interesting fact for you: more likely than not, a woman isn’t always testing you on a conscious level. This means that sometimes she isn’t even aware of it. If you have ever been in a relationship, you have probably experienced it firsthand where all of a sudden she starts “acting weird” and doesn’t even know it herself why she’s doing it.
But no matter the case, you should never take tests personally. Most women will test you because they’re interested in you/want you to demonstrate your masculine power. So be glad when she tests you because she’s either seeing you as a potential partner (when single) or gives you a valuable hint to get your shit together before the situation worsens (in a relationship).
And here’s one tip for the guy looking to find a girlfriend: passing her tests doesn’t guarantee you a relationship with her. If you’re in it for the long term, you need to widen your focus on more important matters: demonstrating that you are boyfriend material.
The Never Ending Tests
Okay, as we now reached the conclusion that it’s important to pass tests, all you really have to do is to make sure that whenever you meet a girl, you’ll pass them. After she realizes what an awesome guy you are, everything will be smooth sailing thereafter. Right? I mean, surely if you have passed most of her tests and are now in a relationship with her, you don’t have to worry about them ever again, right?
A woman will test the same guy throughout the whole relationship. For her, it’s important to see if he’s still the man she fell for. She wants to be sure that the guy she found attractive at the beginning of the relationship is still the same a couple of months in. So she tests him... and if he constantly fails these tests, she will lose attraction and might even leave him.
With passing time, though, she will need less and less proof (if he manages to pass her tests most of the time) and feels safe knowing that he is, in fact, a man with a strong character – someone who won’t just let others (including her) run over him; someone with a backbone. And that’s what a woman really wants from her man: to feel safe knowing he’s reliable, and if needed, can support her.
However, on the rare occasion when the intensity of the tests doesn’t stop, you could be in a relationship with an insecure person. Then it’s up to you to decide if you really want to stay with her and get bombarded with one test after another or just leave.
Nevertheless, should you fail tests too many times, a woman will feel that something is off and lose attraction for you. Sometimes she might not even understand herself what it is, but she feels it in her gut and starts acting accordingly. This means that she will ignore you or stop reacting to you altogether (when single) or even antagonize you to get a reaction from you (in a relationship).
So no matter your relationship status, you should always be ready to face a test in one form or other. But does this mean that you have to always be on the lookout for one, constantly worrying when you’re going to get a test thrown at you? Of course not!
It means that you should stay the badass she fell for at the beginning of the relationship. If you start to take the relationship (or her) for granted, stop growing as a man, or lose your “masculine power”, you can be sure that she will start testing you again! While in the beginning, she will do it to see whether or not you are legit, later on, she will only do it if she needs a reminder or sees you slipping.
How do Women Test You?
By now you are probably eager to know how women test you. So let me explain.
It’s actually pretty simple and straightforward. Women are always observing your behavior in an interaction, often how you react to them (or your surroundings). If they say something bizarre just to get a rise out of you or try to put you on the defensive, then you’re being tested. And if you react to it in the wrong way, you fail!
Usually, the best course of action when you are being tested is to not become defensive when she says or does something. If you don’t let her behavior affect yours, you will pass her test.
The one thing you should avoid at all costs, though, is to get too paranoid and take everything that a girl says or does as a test. Not everything is a test! If you start to take every little thing as one, it will backfire on you terribly.
If she is a stranger to you and doesn’t respond to you at all, or very seriously tells you to back off, then you need to let it go and not assume she acts this way because she is testing you. Other times a woman might even just says things that are on her mind and could require a reaction from you, so if you respond to her as if you would respond to a test, it will definitely not end well.
So, some social awareness is still required when you get into situations where you’re not certain how to respond. To make this a bit easier for you, here are a couple of examples where a woman is testing you:
- In a relationship - Even though you both agreed that you’re going out to spend some time with your buddies, when it’s time to go, she suddenly changes her mind and starts to protest insisting you stay home with her.
- When talking to a girl who looks interested - In one moment she seems ecstatic talking to you, in the next, her demeanor changes completely and she seems distant.
- In a relationship, but also with a girl whom you just met - She makes a comment about you that could be interpreted as negative.
- When approaching a girl you like - Instead of being nice to you, she gives you the cold shoulder or acts like a bitch.
As you can see from the examples above, sometimes her behavior can seem odd, but when taking into account that she’s testing you, it suddenly starts to make a lot of sense.
In the first example where she instantly changes her mind, it is to see whether you cave in and stay at home with her or actually have the backbone to disagree. By staying home you might even make her happy in the moment, but it will have lasting negative effects in the long-term.
In the second example, she becomes quiet to see how you’re going to react to it. If you lose your cool because you can’t deal with the pressure, she will notice it and lose interest in you. But if you continue talking to her as if nothing has happened, she will eventually warm up to you again and feel attraction.
In the third example, you simply don’t pay any attention to it – confident people don’t care what anyone says about them. Of course, sometimes it’s also okay to react to it by going along with it (jokingly) or letting her know that you won’t stand for being ridiculed (only if she actually does it!).
The final example can be a bit tricky. If she’s testing you, it’s to assess how you respond. If you stay calm and collected and won’t let her behavior dictate yours, she will eventually warm up to you. But like already mentioned, sometimes this doesn’t work because she really is a mean bitch or you actually are bothering her, so your best bet is to move on.
Okay, so we looked at what a test is and why it’s important, then we realized that “you can’t escape it”, and now we have taken a look at some of the examples. What next? Well, let’s just figure out...
How to Pass Her Tests Every Time
Like I already mentioned at the beginning of this article, there are really two ways you can pass a test: 1) you stay unreactive 2) you react to it in the right way. So, let’s take a look at both of them:
1) By not reacting to her test, you basically demonstrate to her that it doesn’t phase you. That no matter what she throws at you, you can stay cool and collected. This is a sign of higher value – men who don’t react are more confident and experienced.
2) When you react, it needs to come from a place of authentic masculine energy. This means that you express yourself freely without pulling any punches. So when a girl is giving you shit, you tell her in a calm but assertive way to back off. Yes, even when reacting, you stay calm and collected because reacting in any other way means she got under your skin.
Both of these “methods” work because they demonstrate traits (like confidence, dominance, integrity etc.) that are considered attractive by women.
Now, when should you be using either one of them is for you to figure out. With a little social awareness, you’ll be able to distinguish when staying unreactive is the right course of action and when you need to standing your ground so you won’t look like a pushover.
There isn’t really a fast way to determine what you should be doing in every situation. Only if you acquire the core understanding of the female psyche, will you be able to tell that. Of course, this doesn’t mean you have to know everything about women. You just need to know what kind of traits and behaviors they respond to. Armed with this knowledge, you can separate a test from something she really says (means) and does, and know how to respond to it.
In order to get a better understanding of the female psyche, you have to understand the dynamics of male-female relationships and this goes beyond the scope of this article. What you can do though, is to go out and start interacting with as many women as possible! This will help you to get a feel for it naturally.
But if you are looking for a faster (and more efficient) method, check out my course Rules of the Alpha Male. It will clear up many questions and misconceptions you might have, and as an added benefit, turn you into a badass with women!
On a final note: Passing test shouldn’t be about tricking women into liking you. By passing them, you’ll look like a man with a strong character. But if you’re just pretending, women will see through you and still reject/dump you. That’s why it’s important that instead of just playing one, you actually take the necessary steps to become one!