Women test men constantly. If you already knew this or just became aware of it now, the fact remains the same – everyone of us has at some point in our lives been tested by a woman.
However, the problem isn’t that most of us aren’t aware of this fact, but that we don’t even recognize when we are being tested. Hell, there could be a woman standing behind you right now… testing you… and you wouldn’t even know it!
But all jokes aside; to know when you are being tested, you first have to understand what exactly a test is, then learn to recognize one and finally how to react to it.
What is a Test?
Basically, testing is a screening tool to see if you have strength of character (or backbone, if you prefer this phrasing). For her, it is a way to see how you would behave in certain situations. If you manage to pass her tests constantly, she will categorize you as an alpha male and feel attraction for you. If not, she will categorize you as a wimp and lose interest (if there was any to begin with).
And trust me, getting a girl interested again is a real challenge; sometimes even impossible. That’s why your best course of action is to pass most of her tests so that she will become and stay attracted. Therefore, be ready to get tested all the time.
Of course, it should be noted that passing a woman’s tests is often only a short-term solution and doesn’t bring you much closer to becoming exclusive with her. So, instead of worrying about this small factor in attraction, you should shift your focus to more important matters – demonstrating that you are actually boyfriend material. But if you just met a girl and aren’t in for the long-term, passing her tests will definitely set you apart from others.
Why do Women Test You?
But surely if you have passed most of her test and are now in a relationship with her, you don’t have to worry about them again. Right?
A woman will test the same guy throughout the whole relationship. For her, it’s important to see if he’s still the man she fell for. She can’t stay sure if the guy she found so attractive at the beginning of the relationship, is still the same a couple of months in. So she tests him, and if he constantly fails these tests, she will lose interest and might even dump him.
With passing time, though, she will need less and less proof (if you manage to pass her tests most of the time) and feels safe knowing that you are in fact a man with a backbone, and when needed, can support her. That’s what a woman really wants – to feel safe knowing her man can take care of her. However, if the tests never stop, you are in a relationship with a very insecure person. Then it’s up to you to decide if you really want to stay with her and get bombarded with one test after another, or just leave.
Now, here is a scary fact for you: a woman isn’t always testing you on purpose. Sometimes she isn’t even aware of it. And if you have ever been in a relationship, you probably have experienced it yourself. When she acts “all weird” and doesn’t even know herself why she is behaving this way, she is subconsciously testing you.
Nevertheless, should you fail these tests, she will feel that something is off and lose attraction for you. She doesn’t even know what it is, but she feels it in her gut and starts acting accordingly. This means she might start to ignore you or won’t react to you the way you are used to.
Sometimes women don’t even have to say anything to test you. Just imagine a situation where you see a girl you are attracted to. So you muster up your courage and go to talk to her. But instead of being nice to you, she gives you the cold shoulder or acts like a real bitch. This could be a test to see how you will respond to it. If you manage to stay calm and collected and not let her behavior dictate yours, she will eventually warm up to you (of course, sometimes nothing works because she really is a mean bitch).
How do Women Test You?
By now you are probably pretty eager to know how women test you. So let me explain it to you.
It’s actually pretty simple and straightforward. She is always seeking your reaction on how you act towards her. If she says something outlandish just to get a reaction from you and tries to put you on the defensive, she is testing you. And if you react, you have failed her test. In this case, the best course of action would be not to become defensive when she says or does something. If you don’t let her behavior affect yours in any way, you will pass her test.
The one thing you should avoid at all costs, though, is to get too paranoid and take everything that a girl says or does as a test. Not everything is a test! If you start to take every little thing as one, it will backfire on you terribly.
If she is a stranger to you and doesn’t respond to you at all, or very seriously tells you to back off, then you need to let it go and not assume she acts this way because she is testing you. Other times a woman might even just says things that are on her mind and could require a reaction from you, so if you respond to her as if you would respond to a test, it will definitely not end well.
So, What’s the Answer?
Women test men regularly and the best way to distinguish if she is testing you or not is to have a core understanding of the female psyche. This doesn’t mean you have to know everything about her – only what makes a woman tick. Armed with this knowledge, you can separate a test from something she really says (means) and does.
To get a clear understanding of the female psyche, you have to understand the dynamics of male-female relationships and this goes beyond this article. However, you can go out and start interacting with as many women as possible to get a feel for it, or if you are looking for a faster way, take a look at Models by Mark Manson that can clear up many questions you still might have.
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